How To ‘Live On Your Own’ While Living At Home

How To ‘Live On Your Own’ While Living At Home

I’ve talked about living independently in Karachi a few times on the blog so I’m sure quite a lot of you know about that already (never forget my glamorous living situations). The two sentiments that have continued to appear as a result of talking about all the living-away-from-the parents are: ‘I’d love to live alone but my family would never let that happen’ or ‘I wish I could be independent but I have to depend on my family because I don’t know otherwise’.

In our society, I understand that when there is no compelling need to move away from home (for work like I did, or education), it’s not something you can really fight for. Plus, living with your family is the absolute best and even though living alone (especially in Pakistan) sets you up for LIFE (there’s no better crash course), the longer you can enjoy the important relationships in life, why not? I don’t believe living by yourself is the only way to be truly independent and today I want to hand out some tips for being self-sufficient to the best of your abilities, even if you’re dependent on your parents, guardian – or even a spouse (because many women move from parents to husband and never really experience the completely ‘independent’ life). When you know you’re self-sufficient, you may not know how to do everything, but you passionately believe  and trust that you’ll get shit done when you have to.

Disclaimer (what would one of my posts be without a sexy disclaimer or two): I know many women already do many of the things I’ll talk about, AND MORE, and the examples I’ll share for how I did things may sound like I imagine myself to be the shining, glorious pioneer of independent living, BUT. I can only share my experiences to elaborate a point, which I’ll do, I’m not going to be apologetic for what I know. These are for girls/women who’re not as confident, or have had a very sheltered lifestyle, or are just shy and awkward like I phenomenally was. And if you’re a Pakistani magical, self-sufficience centaur, more power to you. We’re not competing, we’re sharing. Share your wisdom too.

Disclaimer II: Any opinion piece/set of tips is always grounded in privilege. I had the privilege of a supportive family, good education, a great job which managed my finances, good luck. But I also worked my hardest, was smart about what was handed to me (which I realise now, I had no idea what I was doing then) and often shook up my own personal status quo, just because. Privilege and self-drive go hand in hand. You cannot subtract one from the other. Attributing everything to privilege is a disservice to someone else and attributing everything to self-drive is a disservice to yourself.

Disclaimer III: Exceptions will exist to everything I’ll say. No one can speak for everyone. Process this post like that. Okay, I’m done, let’s go.

Here are the 11 things I feel you can do to be independent while living right at home in a dependent relationship.

#1. Earn/Pay for yourself. Something you need to start doing as soon as you start working (or even earlier). This doesn’t mean paying for coffee dates with friends or new clothes. This means paying for yourself in entirety – any big purchases, travel plans, should be saved for and come out of your own pocket. If you don’t earn enough, then support yourself partially, but do it. If you’re not allowed to work outside or are not able to (stay-at-home mom, for example), pick up an activity that can potentially pay and start doing it from home. Write freelance, give tuitions, make something with your hands that you know you’re good at and sell it, find someone who’s always busy and ask to be their assistant (a family friend who makes clothes, take her orders? bring them more work?). Create your job, earn your own money, even if it’s a very small amount. I know finding work from home is tough but you have to go out and look a billion times before you find that one assignment that will pay you a tiny bit. It’s not going to fall in your lap. Your end goal needs to be to know that you have to earn and pay for yourself, entirely or partially. Making your own money is going to give you spirit and value for money that someone simply handing you cash is never going to give.

Personal example: When I was about 12 (?), I used to find myself free after school (even after my play/relax time). I begged my mom to find me a kid of a friend’s who I could give tuitions to. She found me someone and I made extra cash on the side. I had no reason for doing this, other than the fact that I wanted to earn for myself. Once on one of my internships at a bank when I was 18, I was nearing the end and still had two weeks of summer vacations to go, so I walked to the bank across the street and asked them to give me work. I didn’t expect it but I thought ‘why not’, but they actually ended up hiring me, so as soon as I got done with one internship, I started another. I was only taking calls at the reception and filling forms, but I learnt so much more (because both internships were different) – confidence in people interactions (I was painfully awkward and shy), professionalism, making myself useful, SO MANY THINGS. Someone could have come up with something better for that time period, but this is what I could manage to the best of my capability and I learnt to earn work for myself. You figure out what you want to do, you figure out your work with whatever time you have.

#2. Pay for your parents or a chunk of the household. If you’re lucky and making enough to support yourself and go beyond, pay for your parents. Even if they say no, pay for them. Entirely or partially. Pay the bills at home. If you can’t do them all, take responsibility to pay one specific bill and make sure you’re the only one delivering on that each month. Most parents always say no to a girl contributing and ask them to save for themselves. You can manage both if you try, so let them say it and do both (of course, exceptions will exist). A luxury of living with the parents for a lot of people is that your home and utilities are paid for – don’t let that make you less ambitious, leverage it and support them with what you can.

Personal example: When I did start earning at 21, despite living away from home, within a few months I was sending more than half my salary home for supporting my family. I started sending it of my own choice, they didn’t ask me to. It was my firm belief that I had to earn and take over from my parents; it was their time to sit down and chill. After I got married, a lot of people told me, ‘oh but it’s easy now because your husband can support you’. Okay sure, he can (though I want to support myself), but what about my parents? It’s MY JOB to support my mom before anything else, so I need to work (yes even if I have a brother). Even if your parents can manage, it’s important to support them in some capacity so let’s do it. Women underestimate and devalue their contributions themselves, just imagine the world depends on you and you can give birth to unicorns.

#3. Take over a project at home and execute it from the beginning till the end. If new plumbing needs to be installed at home, tell your parents/spouse you’ll manage it. A new paint job, home repairs, carpentry, anything at all that typically someone else would do, take ownership of it. Source the material, the manpower, the process. In our society, it may get uncomfortable in such situations for a female – in that case, bring along the person who would have originally taken care of the task, but you be the lead on it. Build the confidence to do something you don’t know how to do on your own, while managing people you’re not familiar with.

Personal example: When I was 14 (?), I noticed my dad going to our car and doing random stuff like changing the brake oil, etc. I asked him to take me with him the next time he was about to get all of that done and just teach me so I could do it the next time. No reason, I just wanted to explore new territory and do something I hadn’t done before. When in Karachi, something would break down at home (water pipe burst/painter, electrician or carpenter needs/blah blah), I’d literally head out in my car and just go to one of these shops and pick up one of their workmen. You often don’t have to know how to do things but you can learn if you pretend to yourself that you can do it.

#4. Take on home chores. Giving girls home chores is a desi household’s favorite occupation. But I come from a home where kids were not really given any home chores to do. Our parents were our minions and then we had house help. For people like that, just pick up any home chores and make them a habit. Adding responsibility to your schedule lets you be a more dependable human being, even to yourself. So many of us let ourselves down because we don’t take real responsibility and then live in doubt of our own capabilities. Pick up a chore at home and make it yours. Stay-at-home moms probably don’t need more chores to do, lulz, but for single women at home who’re not expected to work, make yourself responsible even if no one’s asking you.

Personal example: While I was never asked to do any home chores, other than pick up your shit, etc, I don’t know why I chose to do some things everyday just to help my parents out. I’d set the breakfast table, fix my uniform (and my younger brother’s, not because he was a guy but because he was the younger sibling) and polish our shoes every night before going to bed. No one asked me to do this, someone would have done it if I hadn’t, but I still chose to do it every night.

#5. Save up not just for a pair of shoes, but for something big. Saving for your small purchases is great, I mean, new shoes, that’s cool, almost necessary. But plan to save for something bigger than that. Help with a big family purchase like a car, pay off a loan for yourself or your family, save for your wedding or a sibling’s. At times, parents will push to pay for your wedding even if you have cash – don’t deplete their resources even if they’ve saved up for you (that’s what parents do). If you can’t manage it all, pay as much as you can. Parents will sell their souls to pay for your wedding, save their souls, bros.

Personal example: I was so lucky that my family paid for my education all through my life and then my college education. I was half on loan and scholarship in college though and in the five years after graduation, it was only my job to pay it off. I don’t think anyone in my family even remembers that I had to pay off my college loan. I never brought it up with them (because, not their problem) and paid it off when I could; it was my responsibility and I did it. The same for my wedding. I’ve said this before, I didn’t take a penny from my family for my wedding and I planned my wedding against my savings. I could have had much more action at my events (though I didn’t want to) but I didn’t plan for anything that was beyond my savings. My wedding, my responsibility. I saved for all of these while sending money home and paying my rent and combatting usual life expenses like feeding myself cheeseburgers and biryani. I didn’t even take a cent of my wedding salami, it all went to my mom – she’d have to give back to other people at their weddings because they gifted at mine and she deserved to keep it.

#6. Learn to drive and take yourself places. You might not need to, but learn to drive. Its a life skill, learn it. If your family would never let you drive or they don’t have a car, learn to go out alone by yourself (safely). Careem/Uber it (again, safely) and experience what it is to navigate your city without the comfort of moving with someone you know.

Personal example: My dad taught my mom how to drive once she got married for no reason other than the fact that she should be mobile on her own and not dependent on anyone. Being able to drive is honestly just operating a vehicle but the freedom it gives you in being able to learn something new and accomplish things without depending on anyone is fab. I learnt to drive properly once in Karachi and I practically would drive to places with only Google Maps by my side and had to stop every few minutes and check the path I was following (no voice navigation in Pakistan, remember that). I didn’t rely on known places only and I didn’t wait for someone to come with me, I just drove. When I didn’t have a car in Karachi, I’d schedule all my chores for one weekend, book a rental car and go do everything that needed to be done – I didn’t wait for a friend to come help me.

#7. Sign and understand contracts. Everyone typically has some contractual transaction happening at home – property papers, rent agreements, insurance policies, employment contracts of your own or someone you know (parent or sibling). Ask to be taken through any such document, understand the terms and go from the beginning till the end of the process. If you’re getting married, understand your marriage certificate/nikahnama and don’t let someone else do it for you. It might seem silly but processing technical documents gives you confidence that you managed something complicated (which they’re not).

Personal example: I had no choice but to manage my rent agreements when I was living by myself and I still do them now for us. But I remember reading my dad’s property contract papers for no reason when I was younger, just out of curiosity. I didn’t ask him to help me understand them so I didn’t know what was really going on but I do remember going over them casually – whatever you learn even if it’s just a new word, will up your overall approach to life, so get into everything.

#8. If you can, make an investment. Even if tiny, get started with one. You should make your money work for you and investments give you back without having to do significant legwork on them (unlike a salaried job). Even if you begin with a low-yield bond, it will be yours, so think about putting some money into even a low-risk investment to start with. Always, always enroll in your company’s retirement schemes, don’t delay submitting forms for things like Provident Funds, read policies and figure out where your company gives money back to the employee and register before anything else.

Personal example: I never made any investments actively when I was on my own but I did participate in my company’s share purchase plan which would double your money for your purchased, actualized shares so it was a great way to get extra money on the side. Now since I work for myself, I invest in National Bonds and you earn/invest quietly on the side and in just a few years you have this chunk of money that you practically had to do nothing for.

#9. Travel alone. Nothing better than navigating day and night entirely on your own in a new place with no one familiar to help you out with your movement or fears. If you cannot travel alone at all, try going with a few friends on group trips, there are so many now in Pakistan (and even outside). And if traveling with friends is a no-no too, use your family vacations for the same and do a small part by yourself to see how you feel when you’re entirely on your own. Either go have coffee by yourself early morning (even if it’s down to the hotel lobby), or a walk on your own (even if on hotel premises) – test yourself and see how you feel.

Personal example: I was super lucky to have traveled to many countries completely alone thanks to my job, or I would have never pushed myself to do something like that, I used to be THAT shy and afraid. Solo travel is legendary and brings you out of your comfort zone like nothing else so try it out, if you can.

#10. Communicate with the ‘controllers’ in your life. Part of being independent is speaking up for yourself. I know a lot of females in our society aren’t ‘allowed’ a lot of things by a parent or a spouse or guardian, so this is for them (it’s not right but it’s the reality). There are things that aren’t allowed to some of us and then there are things we don’t allow ourselves because we assume it will be a ‘no’, no matter what. For everything in life, my policy is to communicate and ask for what you want (while I was living at home, not anymore, I do what I want, lulz). If you communicate and are rational and resilient, a lot of times, people will surprise you and ‘let’ you do things (especially with parents, I know a lot of people don’t want to ‘disappoint’ their procreators so they deny themselves things preemptively). Ask for what you believe is the best for you, ask for it once, ask for it again. My parents weren’t exactly throwing confetti in the air and performing award-winning dandiya when I told them I’m moving to Karachi but I fought for myself and made them come around to the fact that I needed to live on my own. If you ask, it might not happen, but then again, it just might.

#11. Avoid victim mentality. There will always be someone who’ll be earning more than you or has a more supportive family than you or has more time than you or less struggles than you. We all have our stories. There’s no value in comparing and self-restricting by labeling yourself a victim. If you want something done, say no to whoever’s getting in the way, ignore the ones who make noise, tolerate the ones you can’t, figure out a way and get things done. For everything I’ve done, I’ve been given an excuse for why I could’ve done it and not the other person – I don’t care but I wish they did – your life, your take, your solutions. Whine, complain, cry but then make.things.happen. That is all.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Do these things as a lifestyle, not as a summer camp experiment. Make it your priority in life to be as self-sufficient as you can be, even if someone is partially or fully supporting you.

Just because someone can pay for you, doesn’t mean they should.

Independence is a state of mind, more than a physical disposition. It’s entirely up to you how independent you can make yourself while being dependent on another human being. Self-sufficience is layered and can be financial or emotional or physical – you figure out your magic formula and then you make it happen.

Bye.

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61 Comments

  1. I was waiting for your post all afternoon…I read it in my lunch break. I read this in my tea break and it took me 4 minutes I timed myself hehe…I love this post so much. Its sad but I am no. 11 and I don’t take charge of my own life as much as I should. I’m going to plan and all the things you have mentioned that I can do…thanks for always being such a meaningful blogger

    1. Author

      All of us do that! It’s easy to be a victim, and it happens to everyone now and then. Lots of luck with the planning and I love your daily schedule 😉

  2. It was long 🙂 but very much worth it, thank you I loved everything so much 🙂 I stay at home wife but going to try your tips for finding work and earning some amount for myself

  3. I’m very shy and not confident at all I see you and I wonder how you were shy like you say and did all of that. please share some tips. I cant believe this looking at you now you are amazing

    1. Author

      If you could meet anyone who knew me ten years ago, you’d be shocked to hear their version of me. I’ve definitely learnt a lot, everyone can <3 It's a gradual process, give yourself time and trust yourself.

  4. I wish i could transform myself into you. There are so many things I wanna do but just finding some inspo to get started.

  5. Just read the complete post, and I absolutely love the way you write. Your writing is simple and personal, and makes one want to get up and do something.
    I was thinking that you can write about missed opportunities; like the older I get I get the feeling of ‘I wish I had done that sooner’, and sometimes that motivates me and sometimes it disheartens me. Would love to hear your thoughts on that.

    1. Author

      I’m always on the ‘started everything too late’ train so I totally get what you’re saying 🙂 Thank you so much for the sweet words <3

  6. Love this post! Been living by myself abroad for 7 years now. Have evolved so much in that time – from someone who lived a very privileged/dependent life like you did with your family – to someone whose entirely independent and self-reliant. The kind of self-confidence and satisfaction that living independently and giving back to your family gives is unparalleled.

  7. I really needed this kind of post in my life right now. Thankyou for being my angel in disguise☺️
    It was detailed and much needed.
    Kudos to you for being super woman right from teen age!

  8. Shehzeen, thanks for writing this. Literally. I’ve been preaching these things to every girl I know. These points are so important especially for girls because boys in our society are bachpan se trained to one day be independent but girls are always raised to be “taken care of”. I don’t agree with this and believe that every girl should learn how to support herself because you never know what life might throw at you. At that time, one should have at least the confidence to navigate through it rather than playing the victim or bechari card.

  9. This is a great read! Very apt and thoughtfully worded. Surprisingly enough I could relate to more than Half of it 🙂
    Have earned and maintained my own independence amidst being a family person in a closely guarded household. Your writing brought back a lot of memories…. thanks a lot. And for the revival of the motivation.

  10. No personal examples for 10 and 11? If you never had to communicate shitty things with your parents then you do have the best parents in the world. Like you said privilege comes in handy !

    1. Author

      I did mention that I had to make them let me stay by myself, they weren’t on board initially 🙂 But I chose to not give personal examples separately for those two points. I do/did have supportive parents but everyone’s struggle is relative to their circumstance.

  11. Ugh I relate to all of this – I have been priveledged enough to live abroad and travel alone but some of these things I can definitely do. I often ask to pay for groceries but am shut down, I see now that I ll have to be more assertive. And the investment but, definitely need to get on that.

  12. These are some really important and practical things that everyone must do. Taking hold of your own life is the biggest favour you do could do to yourself. I have always tried doing that while living with my parents. It has nothing but helped me being dependent on myself and it is a very satisfying feeling.
    But also there are so many restrictions for some girls for going out or travelling. Living on your own and travelling teaches us many life lessons. Wish our parents could understand this as well.

    1. Author

      Agree, it’s a slow climb on both sides. Best to work with what you’ve got and push as best as you can 🙂

  13. Tu hamesha correct baat bol deti hai janeman! 😛 (Dialog from movie: Love Aaj Kal)

  14. This is something everyone MUST read. It is simply written, succinct and to the point. Girls in our society are generally taught to be always dependant on some male figure, be it their father, brother, husband or son. And if life drops them in deep soup at any point in their life, then they are the bechaaris they have been brought up to be. Kudos to you and thank you for writing this!

    1. Author

      I do love you for calling it succinct 😀 Thank you so much, such feedback makes writing it so worth it <3

      1. You are welcome! Love your blogs and always wait for them. You write about so much that is relateable.

  15. One of the reasons why I love your blog is how logical and reasonable your posts are! yes for some it maybe taking liberties with what they’ve been taught growing up but at the crux of it all, it is sane and useful advice. More power to you Shehzeen for actually changing the way people in Pakistan (especially girls) think and grow 🙂

  16. This is just an amazing post. Loved it from heart and glad to discover that I am also an independent living in family. You rock.

  17. Best post so far. You have achieved the highest level of respect in my eyes(though it wasn’t low before😉), reading about the ways you have been spending your life have made you my hero. Love you😚

  18. Lovely as always, thanku for inspiring me once again

  19. Great post. Good effort.
    if you don’t mind in which subjects you graduate. Just curious

  20. What a great read. What a revolution. Becoming a mom to baby Nayyarah makes me want to be the best kind of role model there ever was. No excuses. And to be a strong female role model for boys! Keep their standards high. For themselves and the women they choose to surround themselves with. My nana would always tell us there was ‘dignity in labor’. There is dignity in every act that makes you self reliant.
    Thankyou for writing this piece. It’s so urgent and so necessary.

  21. Growing up in a very protective household I could never think of owning a car, going out by myself or traveling solo or even siting alone in a coffee shop and enjoying a coffee. My parents idea of independence was only till you are educated and you have a job. They used to control the other areas-my choice of dressing, friends, how I spend the money, what I eat etc. As I grew up, i dint feel comfortable in this situation. I also realized its no fault of my parents as this is what I have clearly allowed for many years and this is all they have seen and known in their life. So i decided to parent my parents and take charge of my life. From my license to financing my MBA and car, skydiving, my solo trip to Bhutan, and the latest being choosing my life partner <3 – I am glad I made it all happen, I am glad that I decided to take control of my life. Though i dealt with a lot of self doubt and guilt initially I am happy with the way things turned out to be. Now everyone i know thinks my parents are super cool while I am disco-ing in the inside. Great post Shehzeen…You just made me do a self-appraisal and I feel so good. Thanks very much for that… I am sharing this post with all the growing girls and boys i know.
    PS: for some reason, in the last pic, i felt the clouds moving and the leaves swaying. Mayb i stared at it too long…

    1. I had a similar experience. I stated taking charge of my life once I realized I need to experience things for my own good. The only thing I regret is the feelings of guilt back then. But then this is also part of the learning process. Three cheers for us !

  22. Since we are talking about adulting and independence and all that comes with it here is what happened to me.
    I started working at the age of 23. I was a Teaching Assistant back then. Once, I was asked to organize a trip to Lahore. I made the necessary arrangements a day before , told my mom and went to the university the next day. The only glitch was I didn’t have the official approval in my hand till the day I we were supposed to leave.
    Anyway, I got the official approval in the morning the day we were supposed to leave. I called my mom and off I went like a responsible chaperone. My dad didn’t come to know about the plan. Later that night when I came back, I was in for a surprise. My dad was curious beyond belief. He said I didn’t get his permission, made a silly decision and didn’t care to come back on time.
    I still think it wasn’t my fault but I did learn that if I live in my parents house I have to make my way through by earning their trust. (Its the same parents who let me go abroad on official trips a number times without any hesitation).

  23. LOVE this. Your posts are so motivating.just had a child and life seems crazy at the moment but so monotonous! didnt think i would be doing this after all the empowering experiences at lums. Khair point is.after reading this post im going to do something..even if it is basic and homebased.. figers crossed.so thankyou <3

    P.s. LOL at 'award winning dandiya'. :pp

  24. Ahhhh yar… I want to cry after reading this article.. I want to be independent..I want to do all these things.. bt I am stuck. I don’t know why I can’t do anything 🙁 I am a loser 🙁

    1. Dont think like that you’re not a loser, you are only not getting chance to do these things even if you want to and it doesn’t mean that you’re a loser
      I have a same situation like you but i dont think that I’m a loser. Sometimes there are circumstances which did not allow us to fo things but be positive your time will come. 😊
      Godblessyou 😊

  25. This article sums up why you are truly “the desi wonderwoman”!

  26. This was MUCH NEEDED shehzeen!! Thank you so much for writing this. I actually need to bring a change in my life as a highly dependent, shy, zero-confidence girl. Thank you for the motivation, thank you for this blog!! I randomly came across it a few weeks back and now i literally wait for your posts. I don’t care if this post is long, i’m going to read it many times a day, probably everyday, until I have become the person i want to be. So much love for you 💜

  27. What a refreshing take on such age old issues of confidence, liberty, luxuries of life, societal pressures. It is indeed a privilege to have parents that understand you and moreover a spouse who is not threatened by your ‘independence’. Great article.

  28. This article is so INSPIRING!!! I’ve always been dependent on my family, not that I don’t want to be independent, just because I’m not allowed to be one. I tried talking to my parents multiple times by now but whenever they give me a chance to do something on my own I end up committing huge blunders. It feels terrible, I know!! And somehow for all these reasons I’ve lost my confidence entirely.
    Also, it feels like I’m stuck in a circle of not being able to do things on my own, talking to my family for allowing me (sometimes arguing, I must confess), given a chance and then again because of not upholding their quality standards, I end up being back to square one!
    However, all of this does not mean I never tried or fought for doing, at least, things for myself, for instance buying clothes of my own choice, but I’m always put down for not buying the good stuff or for the reasons that I don’t have ‘a good’ sense of choice. So my mother buys things for me most of the time (ALL the time to he honest, khikhez).
    So sum up, all I want to say is your post give me so much hope and courage to make a difference. I hope I share about my new independent life real soon! 🙂
    Have a good day Shehzeen, much love ❤️

  29. I guess I needed it at this particular time of my life.
    Left my job last year (after 5years) because of certain health issues and priorities. Then didn’t join back because people around me would tell me that its my husband’s responsibility to earn and not mine. Also, that ‘you’ll spoil your husband by earning’ ‘he’ll start relying on your money’ etc.
    Also, saw some live examples of husbands sitting idly at home after retirement and their independent wives are still winning the bread and butter, like the way they did all their lives, along with their husbands. Their husbands retired but they didn’t. (I know they went wrong somewhere but I can’t distinguish where.)
    On the other hand saw extremely dependent housewives who would rely on their husbands even for the smallest of life decisions. They would just state their requirements and ask their husbands to fulfill without caring about the limited resources or income of their husband/bread winner.
    I am currently going through a phase of deep depression. I was flourishing in my career… and then I left it. Very confused. HELP!!!

    1. Aisha do what you need to do for YOU. You owe it to your self. Yes prioritize your health of course and don’t kill your self over a job but do something. It may be another set of skills you have. Put them to use and get back out there.

      1. yes, Inshallah I’ll definitely get back on track soon.
        But I do want to hear yout take about ‘Husbands ko bigarney’ wala point…

  30. Beautifully written. Wish I had this advice 10 years ago!

  31. such a motivational blog!!! I can relate myself to alot of stuff you did before getting married… But I have lost all my self respect + self confidence after living in a typical joint family system…who believes that support from a “maika” is everything for a girl… and if you don’t have it then You’re a Victim for sure!!!

    love you… for all your advices and experiences 😍😍😘😘

  32. I waited so much time so I could properly read and digest this. Absolutely perfectly penned down and so much in line with what I have been recently thinking and talking with like minded friends. This is as important for females in our country / culture but also for parents to evolve their thinking of how to bring up females ! Independence truly is a state of mind and the joy of supporting yourself and contributing to your parents income is truly like no other 🙂
    I want to make this mandatory reading for all females before they get married or before making any major life decisions and my favourite bit is “birthing Unicorns” LOL
    You are such an inspiration DWW !

  33. This is beautiful and very helpful i feel very dependent on my family they dont let me do things,
    Because of this i think I’m unable to take big decisions (may be fear of failing) but after reading this blog i will try to do some of them.
    God bless you 😊

  34. Amazing Post as always. You truly are an Inspiring Person.
    I want to say something. (It should be printed in some Magazine or Paper so that your words could reach out to maximum Boys and Girls who are soo dependant on 1 earning /working Person at Home)

  35. One of ure best ppsts ever.. sooo creative.. so easy to do.. i never did but wish i had..u r just too cool esp taking intrrest in the car and contracts with ure dad.. wow.. u were a prodigy

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